May's Next Husbando TIER LIST! 2023-01-29

0:00:00
Unknown_00: What's up guys, it's JCM92 coming at you again with another tier list. If you haven't heard, May has abandoned Ethan Ralph and stolen the baby and fled the JFK International Airport. They were supposed to be going to Rome for like a honeymoon and then they landed in JFK and Ralph said they were arguing on the way there but he didn't expect it to be a big deal. they get to JFK which is in you know New York it's near where her father is and then she just disappears with the baby so now nobody knows what's happened Ralph has deleted tweets about this May is MIA and it looks like the divorce saga may be happening a little bit sooner than we expected because they just got married like literally two weeks ago and a little bit more However, I want to help her get over this loss as quickly as possible. So I'm coming up with a list of people That I think may could end up with and I'm gonna rank them on this this tier list It says tier list name up here. I should actually probably change that to a

0:00:50
Unknown_00: to be something else so that it doesn't look so fucking lazy so let's swap that out we're gonna grab font let's let's make it Quattro Cinco because that's uh that's the goodest font and we'll say who and we'll say in white so we can actually read it who let's try again to make this white so that we can actually read it and it will say who may should get with now We're actually going to make this bold because it's the title and it should be bold. Perfect. Okay, here we go. We're going to start with our list.

0:01:34
Unknown_00: Um, let's get let's get some easy ones out of the way first We got medicare here. Now. What could I am aware that medicare is married already? So that's already like a point against this ship happening May Is not asian. So there's low synergy here however may could potentially do things for for medicare and it would be pretty funny if um so we'll go ahead and we'll be nice and we'll say that's a d tier ship i'm sure may would be very enthusiastic about it even if she was like a sister wife even if she wasn't like the proper wife but we'll go ahead and put that in the d

0:02:08
Unknown_00: uh then we got rambot this is another kind of i said i should start with the easy ones but now i'm kind of tripping myself up rambot is also married however rambot is like a neo-nazi white supremacist who's married to a jew and uh i think they have kids together but he doesn't seem very happy in his marriage because he gets drunk and cries to ralph about how much he hates his wife

Unknown_00: However, Mei would probably feel really smart in a relationship with Ranbot, which is a point in her favor, because she's probably never felt smart in a relationship with anybody ever.

0:02:59
Unknown_00: They both like anime, and Mei is Italian, which is ostensibly white, depending on who you ask. So I'm gonna go ahead, and actually, I'm gonna rate Ranbot as a C tier, and put that above Jim.

Unknown_00: Now,

Unknown_00: Now someone truly easy. This is Aquaman. This is from the latest movie. I don't have a picture of this guy. There is a guy that has been simping for May since they were in college together. And this was the guy that worked at the aquarium. And Ralph threatened to get this guy fired. But this guy is like an OG simp for May, one of her true loves. I'm going to go ahead. I'm going to throw him up in the A tier for Aquaman.

0:03:39
Unknown_00: Actually, you know what? Yeah, you know, I'll keep him in A.

Unknown_00: I'll keep him an A. I'm really deciding to drop him down to a B, but I'm going to be nice. I'm going to keep him an A. Jesse from Potawful, easy F tier because this would actually give him notoriety. This is the only person that Mae could fuck that would have less clout than her. And Jesse from Potawful needs no clout ever from anyone. Easy F tier pick.

Unknown_00: Now, someone she could gain clout from is Dick Masterson. Dick Masterson is in a long-term relationship, but he likes young girls. Mae is kind of youngish. I don't know what his opinions are on single moms. I don't think I've ever heard him mention a single mom ever in like his podcast that I've heard.

0:04:16
Unknown_00: But that would be really funny if he hooked up with Mae. He doesn't really have any strings with his current girlfriend to keep her around.

Unknown_00: The main thing is that Dick hates children. So while it would be really funny, the kid definitely complicates factors and I just don't think that they have anything Any interest like he likes women that are extremely like gifted with physical attributes that may completely lack so unfortunately, I'm gonna have to put that in the eat here just to the unlikeliness lack of synergy and And then so on Now we have some better options here. I think these are all going to be higher up. Chris Chan, of course, uh, as someone that may has already met, uh, when, when may saw Christian in real life at the parking lot of that apartment building, she cried out to him, Chris, we love you. I think she said that literally. And she said, we're big fans. And then she also said, don't worry, Chris. I also have gender issues. so chris as a as a trans identifying lesbian would be all for having a lesbian's relationship with uh amanda um amanda would gain a ton of notoriety from being chris's girlfriend and uh the baby

0:05:52
Unknown_00: I don't think Chris would be good with kids. I'm going to be real with you. Knowing what I know about Chris, I don't think what's going to happen. However, May can just take care of them both as children. So we're going to go ahead and throw Chris up in the B tier because I think they like anime and shit. I think they would just be great for each other. Really healthy dynamic.

Unknown_00: Pics are getting more and more interesting now. I think I'll weed out Godwinson. Now, Godwinson has everything that a woman can want in a man. He's rich, he's funny, he's charismatic, he's in shape. Downsides with Godwinson, he's British. That's kind of a deal breaker for almost everyone. I also think that Godwinson is a psychopath that stabs homeless people in the middle of the night like American Psycho.

0:06:27
Unknown_00: However, he might he might be willing to to bone may just because it would be funny However, I don't think that's actually likely and may might die as a result So since I'm trying to like make like a real relationship here I'm gonna have to go ahead and throw Godwinson in the D tier next to medic her Because I think she would end up in a dumpster

0:07:04
Unknown_00: Let's continue on.

Unknown_00: I'm gonna go ahead and throw up an S tier. I think I don't know actually if I should put PPP as an S tier or an A tier. Here's my thoughts with PPP. PPP is a homosexual, so he needs a beard. That beard can be Mae. I don't think that she would be interested in having sex with PPP, but it would make PPP look straight. It would give Amanda some sort of stability, to have this man earning income for them.

0:07:37
Unknown_00: She could potentially help with the writing for the Kino Casino, because God knows they need it. And additionally, I think that Andy Warski could be considered the godfather for little baby Rosie, and he could just refer to himself as the godfather forever. And I think Andy Warski would be really happy calling himself the godfather. and they would find it really funny to be raising Rosie even if it is kind of like a stepfather my girlfriend's daughter type situation it would still it would be funny enough that i think a lot of people would forgive that so i'm actually going to go ahead and i'm going to throw ppp and the godfather andy warski up in the a tier and make him a little bit bigger because he is ppp and he's the biggest in the sector uh on that note

0:08:23
Unknown_00: Let's take a look at Faith. Faith, of course, is raising the other child of Ethan Ralph.

Unknown_00: Faith is mentally ill, and I think May is too. I think they both like anime. I'm considering anime a huge factor in this. If you like anime, you're already a massive consideration for being in a relationship with May.

Unknown_00: I think that they could form a natural support structure. Matthew Vickers could pay for both of them, I think. It would be good for them together. So I'm going to go ahead and I'm going to throw Faith up in the B tier. The only reason why I don't throw it up in A is because there's no sexual dynamic between them. I think PPP could maybe do her a solid every so often because he's good at eating. And that would keep them from going insane.

0:08:55
Unknown_00: But now we gotta really move on to the S tiers. Here we have Gator. Gator, I literally cannot think of a better match for Mei. They both like anime. Mei has like that stick figure body type. He has this waifu, right? He has this waifu. I've actually gone ahead and I've photoshopped Amanda into his waifu.

0:09:32
Unknown_00: This is the actual waifu. It's from Steins Gate. So you can see that this waifu here is pretty close when it's cosplayed as Mei.

Unknown_00: So I think that they could just dress up like each other and Gator would be super happy like that. Gator would remember her birthday because he's very good at that.

0:10:08
Unknown_00: Gator is an educated man. He can carry it. He can keep down a job. He can hold commitments. And he probably can't do better than Mei. He actually posted a message on post saying, sorry, I can't do better than Mei. I actually disagree with this. I'm not even being unironic.

Unknown_00: I am going to throw Gator up at the tippy top as an S tier pick for Amanda. She should lock that boy down. I think that their chemistry together, their love for anime makes them a power couple. Similarly, Flamenco is kind of like a shittier version of Gator, I would say. I don't know how else to put it. I think he has a diploma and he has a job. Meg does like Starbucks. Remember that when Rosie was first born, she would go to Starbucks like four times a day to get the fuck away from Ralph. and um as the as the uh gift card connoisseur hoping to brighten a few swedish days nobody could brighten a day better than than flamenco i'm pretty sure so i'm putting him up on s tier on the right side of ppp because he's too big now i have i actually have a secret pick over here that i've been hiding This is Digibro. Digibro, uh, she could always just go back to Digibro. The problem is that Digibro is a tranny. So for her own mental health, I wouldn't recommend that.

0:11:20
Unknown_00: Um, but maybe they could hammer things out now that she's completely humiliated himself. I'm going to go ahead and put Digibro up on, on the boot here. You know, being a trans is sort of a deal. And I actually have a super secret pick, Mundane Matt.

Unknown_00: Hear me out. Matt has proven time and time again that he is there for his girlfriend's daughter. Everyone knows this. He is a devoted stepfather. God bless him. He can hold down a job. And I don't think he actually, like, he just doesn't seem like he cares about anything. I don't think he has any interest. So he would just be down for whatever. He would be down for watching whatever stupid shit that Mae wants to watch. And I'm gonna go ahead, I'm gonna throw MundaneMet up there as an A tier, as someone who I think Mei could get along with and who would, she wouldn't love him, but she would learn to deal with him and to tolerate him. And that's what we're really looking for here. That's kind of the secret sauce. So this is my final tier, my tier list.

0:12:27
Unknown_00: Hope that I've provided some insight, hope I've given Mei something to think about in terms of prospects. I hope Gator grounds himself in reality cuz come the fuck on and I'll catch you the next time I'm making a tier list for oh shit. I forgot one. I actually oh my god Okay, hold up. I need to pull this up. I I was gonna make to Make a joke about a different tier list. I reminded myself that I forgot

0:13:01
Unknown_00: Queen Kafals. Now let's be honest here, okay?

Unknown_00: Queen Kafals is Ralph's one true love.

Unknown_00: Ralph went on and on about how much he loves Kafals, how much, how beautiful Kafals is, how much he appreciates her hard work day in and day out to bring down the Kiwi farms. However, if May, Now, Keffels can't have kids because of their condition, their lifestyle choice, but they do want kids. They've said that their audience is like a bunch of kids to them. So now May finds herself in a position where she can get with Ralph's one true love and provide children to Queen Keffals when Keffals cannot have any. So we're going to put Keffals up on the A tier.

0:13:37
Unknown_00: as my last addition to this.

Unknown_00: That for sure concludes my chart. I hope you have enjoyed this tier list. Make sure to like and subscribe and keep checking back for more tier lists like this.

0:14:15
Unknown_00: In the comments below, tell me who would you ship Amanda Morris and her demon baby with? Let me know in the comments. I'm looking at all my favorites.

Unknown_00: Thanks a lot. See you when I see you. Peace.