0:00:00
Unknown_03:
We will see. It's 522, text her first.
Unknown_03: I'm not going to text Mobility Mary. I think a 75-year-old woman knows how to answer a text message. I'm pretty sure that she does not.
Unknown_03: How do I change my game for D-Live?
Unknown_10: Sekiro Shadows die twice.
Unknown_10: Oh, that's the bad word filter. Sekiro.
0:00:32
Unknown_03:
Age restriction. Okay, all set up. Yeah, I'm gonna play Sekiro. I wanna play Sekiro.
Unknown_03: That's the facts of the situation. Yes, this is part three. This is after General Tamagotchi or Yamaguchi or whatever the fuck his name is.
Unknown_10: What else am I going to do? The site's stable.
Unknown_03: The site's actually stable for once. I'm not feeling it. I'm not feeling the whole fix the site thing.
0:01:03
Unknown_10:
Let me advertise in one.
Unknown_10: On Twitter.
Unknown_10: Wish I knew how to embed multiple links.
Unknown_10: It's a grow.
Unknown_10: And do live TV.
Unknown_10: Okay.
Unknown_10: And I'll post it in my discord as well.
Unknown_03: I guess I should have done this while it was off, but you know, whatever.
Unknown_03: Doing things correctly has never been what I'm best at.
0:01:43
Unknown_10:
Oh, I don't know any spoilers either. So let's see.
Unknown_10: Increase my mic a little bit so I can.
Unknown_10: Darkside Josh. Yeah, I'm pretty bad at this game and people get mad at me because I get mad at the game, but it's like the game is frustrating.
Unknown_03: I don't know. I don't know what you want. Oh, you know what? I promised people last time I would decrease the width of chat.
0:02:15
Unknown_10:
Game capture to oh, you know what? I'll just do it like this. I'll drop it to 360
0:02:50
Unknown_03:
Okay, so this is just after I beat the, um... I didn't actually beat the snake. People got mad at me because I found a way... What the fuck? What the fuck is this?
Unknown_02: What the fuck is this? I'm gonna jump off the fucking cliff. I'm already...
Unknown_03: I'm afraid to die because I've got so much money.
0:03:39
Unknown_03:
So this is all new by the way. Why can't I target him?
Unknown_07: So I'm saving them from the castle gate.
Unknown_03: Gyobul.
Unknown_07: Gyobul the demon. There's so many assholes here.
Unknown_12: Fuck it. Fuck it up.
0:04:19
Unknown_02:
I thought I got that right. Oh, there it is. See, I'm learning.
Unknown_03: What the fuck? What the fuck is this guy?
Unknown_03: Wait, am I glitching this?
0:05:24
Unknown_03:
Ow.
Unknown_08: Fuck.
Unknown_03: Wait, can I block his attack?
Unknown_03: No, I cannot. I don't want to die to this guy.
Unknown_02: Wait.
0:05:55
Unknown_02:
Let me kill you!
Unknown_02: Thank you, thank you.
Unknown_03: I can't heal, I'm out of water.
Unknown_03: I wanted to kill that guy really, really bad though. Heavy coin purse.
Unknown_03: That's a lot.
Unknown_03: The fuck's that?
Unknown_03: Oops, I fucked it up.
0:06:27
Unknown_03:
There's more bad guys up here.
Unknown_07: I'm not skipping, I'm reading it. They need the little boy's blood so that he could fight bad guys or something.
Unknown_03: I don't know.
0:07:00
Unknown_03:
I don't understand the lore of this game.
Unknown_03: I get the feeling there's something I'm missing in this bombed out area.
Unknown_03: I keep finding sugar that I don't use. It's probably somebody who really hates me for not using sugar. You're not using your sugar.
Unknown_03: It's really important. It's like with, uh, I didn't, I didn't ever play through the witcher cause I hated the combat for the witcher. Cause you have to like constantly grease up your swords with different kinds of lube to make them more effective. And she was like, this isn't, this is a pain in my ass. Oh, his horsey's dead.
0:07:36
Unknown_03:
Oh, that's like a tip for like a thing.
Unknown_03: I think I'm supposed to use gunpowder to startle horsemen or some shit.
0:08:08
Unknown_03:
Also, I think I'm supposed to... I don't know. The lore for...
Unknown_03: Dark Souls always seems really important. People always fucking talk about it.
Unknown_03: Holy shit.
Unknown_03: I need a Buddha.
Unknown_03: I have a really, really, really, really bad feeling about jumping down there.
0:08:45
Unknown_03:
So I'm not going.
Unknown_03: chicken mud.
Unknown_03: Okay. Cause I don't have a choice.
Unknown_03: Well, if I rest at the camp, I mean, does it save? Cause I'm not going to jump down there.
0:09:19
Unknown_03:
Somebody tell me.
Unknown_03: It's definitely like a boss, or some shit.
Unknown_03: There's a demon. Who the fuck is calling me? I have to close this out, I don't know who it is. Oh my god! Make it stop! Unknown.
0:09:56
Unknown_10:
I don't wanna lie to people.
Unknown_10: Alright.
Unknown_10: I'm sorry about that.
Unknown_03: Back to the important stuff.
Unknown_03: I'm not answering the phone. Fuck it, you know what?
Unknown_03: Oh, shit.
Unknown_05: That was a bad idea.
Unknown_03: That was a bad idea. That was a bad idea. That was a bad idea. Oh, I'm so fucking dead. What the fuck?
0:10:29
Unknown_02:
No! God damn it!
Unknown_02: How do I get out?
Unknown_03: Oh, I'm super far. That's it.
0:11:08
Unknown_02:
Stop it!
Unknown_03: Jesus Christ I don't have a gun, I do have the fireworks, but I don't know Do I lose all my money for that? I have to like sneak up to the boss through the fucking thing? Oh, that's a pain in the ass Fuck, that's not what I want How do I change my thing?
0:11:52
Unknown_03:
Loaded shuriken, I don't want that. I want the other one.
Unknown_03: Okay, now I got my shinobi firecracker.
Unknown_03: Fucking goddammit!
Unknown_03: Oh yeah, I can. I can just jump up. Okay. Fight me!
0:12:50
Unknown_02:
Ow! Fuck! Fuck off!
Unknown_03: Oh. I missed my thing.
Unknown_02: Stop it! Stop fucking around, you piece of shit!
0:13:40
Unknown_03:
This guy's hard. I'm gonna be really mad throughout the duration of this, I can already tell.
Unknown_03: It's never clear.
Unknown_03: And kill the boss?
Unknown_03: From the flashback? What the fuck is that?
0:14:15
Unknown_03:
Oh.
Unknown_03: Oh, I see what you're saying. This is the flashback, right?
0:14:46
Unknown_08:
Fuck off!
Unknown_03: That was obviously a stealthy kill.
Unknown_03: And he fucking lied. I don't even know where to buy a coin for it. I don't have the money.
Unknown_03: Guess I can't get up here. I really don't have to kill these guys, I guess.
0:15:23
Unknown_02:
Fuck off.
0:16:21
Unknown_02:
Why are there so many fucking people here?
Unknown_03: Is there another Buddha like on the way to the boss?
0:16:53
Unknown_11:
Fuck off with that.
Unknown_02: I keep pressing the wrong fucking button for block. I don't even know what I'm supposed to do for these guys.
Unknown_03: Oh, this is trying my fucking favor.
0:17:28
Unknown_03:
Oh, I only get one attack in.
Unknown_02: I'm not killing you. You're not worth my fucking time.
Unknown_08: What ass?
0:18:00
Unknown_03:
I know how to do it.
Unknown_03: What axe? I don't have an axe.
Unknown_03: What axe?
Unknown_10: There's no- where is it then?
0:18:36
Unknown_03:
Man, there's no way to stink past these fucking people. I'm gonna get bored doing the same area. Okay, well I don't know where it's at.
Unknown_03: I can pause it and pull it off.
Unknown_12: I'm dead. I've alerted the entire town.
0:19:18
Unknown_03:
Okay, I get it. I understand the concept of an axe and breaking the shield. I don't know where it's at though.
Unknown_03: There is a tool for going back to boot. I remember this.
0:19:54
Unknown_03:
Nobody has a picture of where the X is.
Unknown_03: It's in one of those buildings right before the shield people I think.
0:20:48
Unknown_11:
I don't know, when you stream it's more fun when lots of people are watching.
Unknown_03: Because you want, like, an energy.
0:21:25
Unknown_03:
on here.
0:22:08
Unknown_03:
There it is.
Unknown_03: Now what do I have to like, do I have to add it as a prosthetic?
Unknown_03: I guess so.
0:22:41
Unknown_03:
There's a boss at the end of that road, right? Where the shield guys are? Does it cost crucifixes to use the axe?
Unknown_00: He's already talked with the Dragonrod.
0:23:18
Unknown_03:
No, that's it. What do I have?
Unknown_03: So it does cost, uh, whatever you would call that currency for special attacks.
Unknown_03: And I can counter the spear guy just by using the O correctly, right? With good timing?
0:23:51
Unknown_03:
I didn't know that guy was there.
Unknown_03: I'm the least stealthiest person to ever play this game.
Unknown_03: Much easier.
0:24:58
Unknown_03:
Oh that guy with the spear is like a fucking mini boss or some shit.
Unknown_02: Fuck off. Okay, what the fuck am I gonna do with this asshole? Shooting fucking things at me.
Unknown_03: Hey, press the right button, goddammit.
0:25:37
Unknown_03:
Are you not supposed to use the O to counter it?
Unknown_02: That's bullshit. Like you're supposed to use the fucking right mouse button or whatever the fuck it is.
0:26:16
Unknown_03:
Get the step in- I was pressing fucking no. I was walking into it and pressing fucking no.
Unknown_03: And meanwhile I have a fucking guy shooting fucking fire arrows at me that I can't sneak up on.
Unknown_03: There's like a four hour fucking wait to get back to that area when you just, you just want to get right back into it. And every time they make you fucking walk around and do this fucking gay shit.
Unknown_03: Yeah, you can jump on his head. It's just not letting me because it's doing the fucking glint thing and everything.
0:26:56
Unknown_03:
Can you only do it when the spear is glinting or can you do it whenever he attacks with the Shi or whatever the fuck the red glowing arrow sign is?
0:27:47
Unknown_02:
fucking faggot fucking gay buddy
0:28:33
Unknown_03:
Yo, can you fucking not? I'm busy over here!
Unknown_03: Oh, I'm... Is there... How is there no fucking way... ...to adequately deal with this shit?
0:29:25
Unknown_10:
I can't stealth kill the guy with the fucking bow, and when the guy with the fucking bow is shooting at you constantly, you have no choice but to bum-rush him.
Unknown_03: You can't just take him out.
Unknown_03: Okay, I could use the ceramic shards and shit, but it's like, am I gonna do that every time? It's gonna take me at least four or five dozen tries to beat this guy, so I'm gonna have to go back and use a ceramic shard to lure them away over and fucking over again to accomplish one boss, and it's mind-numbing to do the same exact thing over and over again, but people...
0:30:07
Unknown_03:
People who play these games, it's like, yeah, that's the majesty of it. It's doing the same exact fucking thing, endlessly.
Unknown_03: I can't hit and run the guy with the spear.
0:30:51
Unknown_07:
Fuckin' mine! What am I doing?
Unknown_02: I have three fuckin' people over here.
Unknown_03: I don't see the boss at least. You don't ca- Fuckin' mine! I don't know, I'm scared guys by you.
0:31:34
Unknown_12:
Get the fuck off.
0:32:16
Unknown_03:
I don't think I can Diagro the Spear. I don't think that's a thing that I can actually do.
Unknown_12: I'm really... Nothing turns you off to a game knowing you're gonna have to repeat the same exact fucking area in the same exact fucking way and it takes like a full
Unknown_03: Well, I've not been touched by the torch. The torch is not the issue. The issue is getting attacked by eight fucking things at once.
0:32:49
Unknown_03:
That's the issue.
Unknown_03: Go on the ledge. Walk past the bad guys on the ledge.
Unknown_12: Don't let it die.
Unknown_03: why though i don't understand it's not like it's not even um what's the other game that everyone seems to like that i just don't get it's the one it's it's hotline miami where like okay i get the point of hotline miami hotline miami you are literally repeating the exact same thing over and over
0:33:46
Unknown_03:
but it's so fast paced you don't have time you don't have time to get upset you just start doing it
0:34:22
Unknown_03:
Does he not walk back? Are you just gonna fucking stand there in the fucking rain? In the middle of a fucking puddle? Walk the fuck back to the bridge, you fucking kike.
Unknown_03: I shouldn't swear if I'm broadcasting to Twitch.
Unknown_12: What the fuck is this?
0:34:56
Unknown_03:
So that's the secret, is just to do that over and over again. I don't wanna sneak past- I mean, that's the mini-boss, right? If I sneak past him, I lose my shit. I don't- I don't get- I don't get the- the- Shinobi power-ups or whatever.
0:35:30
Unknown_03:
I don't want those other guys. One over there. Can I like shoot him from this?
Unknown_03: No, that's too far.
0:36:17
Unknown_03:
Oh, I forgot I can run. That's my secret, that's my most secret shenanigan power.
Unknown_03: Isn't this cheesing? Isn't this what people don't want you to do?
Unknown_03: People get mad if you do this.
Unknown_02: What the fuck?
Unknown_02: Wait, stop hugging the fucking wall! There's a crisis here.
0:36:48
Unknown_12:
Where is it? Oh, there it is. If it was a regular attack, it could have blocked.
Unknown_03: Oh, I am a shinobi.
0:37:27
Unknown_03:
I like the axe, I'm just gonna keep using that.
Unknown_03: Hey! What if this guy kills me after that shit?
Unknown_03: Come here. Come here, stop fucking... Come at me!
Unknown_03: You see that high level shinobi master?
Unknown_12: That's why they call me the Shinobi.
Unknown_03: Did I run away? Didn't I stab him in the back?
0:38:02
Unknown_03:
I want to give me- Oh. I didn't read the- Oh, I got a pellet. That's what.
Unknown_03: Give me that Buddha.
0:38:36
Unknown_03:
Oh, I was reading chat. Chat, you betrayed me.
Unknown_02: Ow!
Unknown_02: Fuck off!
Unknown_03: Motion, motion.
Unknown_03: Shinobi Jessica.
Unknown_03: I don't like these guys with the flaming arrows, they hurt. Ow! Why did they persecute me so?
0:39:16
Unknown_02:
Fuck.
Unknown_02: Fire, bad.
0:39:50
Unknown_02:
Stop it! Kill them!
Unknown_11: There's so many of them.
Unknown_02: Why don't you guys fuck off? Ah, fuck! Okay.
0:41:25
Unknown_02:
Can you fucking stop?
Unknown_03: Yes, I get it, I'm burning, thank you.
Unknown_03: Yes, I get it, I'm burning!
Unknown_03: What the fuck is that? Why are there more of you?
0:42:02
Unknown_03:
Fuck off.
Unknown_03: I don't want to fight your dumb ass. Oh.
0:43:27
Unknown_08:
Fuck!
Unknown_03: Fuck you!
Unknown_03: That motherfucker. I just want the Buddha. That's all I want.
0:44:00
Unknown_03:
Just give me the Buddha.
Unknown_03: Oh, no. Everything's on fire.
Unknown_03: Hmm.
Unknown_03: Hmm, I wonder.
Unknown_03: Is there a secret Buddha?
Unknown_03: Hell, yes. I would like a Buddha.
0:44:36
Unknown_03:
Father... I have taken the seal.
Unknown_00: It is in good handling. More importantly... This is... the Lord's seal?
Unknown_03: But...
Unknown_07: Stay intrinsic for asylum in the cliffs, take a back entrance to the cemetery.
0:45:13
Unknown_03:
That's your weapon. Is that it?
Unknown_12: Okay. Um... I feel like a dumbass.
0:45:45
Unknown_03:
Where the fuck do I go? If I die here, I'm gonna be really pissed off.
Unknown_02: Ow! Ow! Owie! Why? !
Unknown_02: Stop it! Stop the pain!
Unknown_02: Fire- Firebat!
Unknown_10: Did I lose my fucking key?
Unknown_10: I hope I didn't lose my fucking key.
0:46:23
Unknown_03:
There it is, okay. I don't need to go back to Dad.
Unknown_03: Do I travel to the start of the map? He said I have to go to the cemetery. I'm trying to remember where the cemetery is.
Unknown_03: Cheery, tell me. What the fuck? This fucker knows my weakness.
0:46:56
Unknown_03:
Okay, I've got health up. Now what?
Unknown_03: Where is the, uh... Jump into the ravine below the bridge. Okay, I know.
Unknown_03: Fuck off. Wait, what the fuck is that?
Unknown_03: No, I did... I'm gonna remember that.
Unknown_03: Joshua will remember this.
0:47:43
Unknown_03:
well it said jump into it oh you're saying i should oh shit
Unknown_03: I have, I have a lot of prayer beads.
0:48:33
Unknown_03:
Yeah, okay.
Unknown_03: Left and, oh.
Unknown_03: Okay.
Unknown_03: So, Acquire Skills.
Unknown_03: Should I get any of these? I'll let Cherry pick because he's good.
Unknown_03: Acquire's Latent Skills should nobody's crowd me by. Increases the maximum number of Spirit Emblems that can be held.
Unknown_03: Mid-Air Deflection. Allows the guard to deflect against enemies mid-air. Allows one to slide into a crouched position when sprinting.
0:49:05
Unknown_03:
Reduces an ability to perceive those who are in itself.
Unknown_03: Four of those level up.
Unknown_03: Oh. Yes.
Unknown_03: Okay, I enhanced my thing, right?
Unknown_03: Okay, midair is the vote.
0:49:43
Unknown_03:
Anything else? I can only buy this one. The run and slide. Slide into a crowd's position while sprinting. I don't think I'd use that one. Okay.
Unknown_03: And now I have to jump back into the ravine.
Unknown_03: Oh, I can do this.
Unknown_03: I am... Big fat guy's back up there again.
0:50:17
Unknown_12:
I actually don't know where I'm going. Shouldn't be a surprise at this point.
Unknown_03: Oh!
Unknown_03: But I have to go back to the one where I hid from the uh... I hid from the spear guy at? That one?
0:50:51
Unknown_03:
okay going back to the skirt guys my favorite i run like naruto when i do that i'm sure i'm the first person to ever say that that is a observation unique to me where
0:52:09
Unknown_06:
I'm hunting down people by using the cave. uh
0:53:12
Unknown_03:
God, that fucking torch! You can't block it!
Unknown_02: How do I put myself out? Fuck off.
Unknown_02: Cocksucker.
Unknown_03: Okay. Back on track.
0:53:48
Unknown_03:
Oh God.
Unknown_03: Oh a Buddha. Give me the Buddha.
0:54:22
Unknown_02:
Holy shit, there's a lot of them.
Unknown_03: Oh, man. My epic gamer plan has not succeeded. Holy fuck, let me block a fuck!
Unknown_10: Okay, let's try that a different way.
0:55:55
Unknown_03:
I guess I can just sneak past them, right?
Unknown_02: They can't get up here.
Unknown_02: Okay, I'm just gonna walk. Fuck you guys.
Unknown_03: I guess that's a way too.
0:56:48
Unknown_02:
Oh, I guess that's the boss.
Unknown_03: I'm doing a very terrible job of exalting this. You know, this reminds me of, um...
Unknown_03: James Bond there was a there was a part of James Bond that looks exactly like this I'm not saying that Sekiro stole level designs from James Bond I'm just saying they might
0:57:34
Unknown_02:
Oh my god, I did not see him there. Holy fuck!
Unknown_02: Oh shit, ow. Holy fuck.
Unknown_02: I've made multiple decisions that are bad.
0:58:21
Unknown_03:
I fucking hate the bow guys. I really fucking hate the bow guys. What the fuck am I supposed to do with this shit? There's like 8 million fucking people here and they're all right next to the guy.
0:59:04
Unknown_02:
Don't, don't, don't, don't, don't. Not having that shit.
Unknown_03: Okay.
Unknown_02: Okay! Back where we started.
0:59:46
Unknown_12:
Okay, I'm already dead.
Unknown_03: Oh! All that effort for nothing!
Unknown_10: Absolutely nothing.
Unknown_10: So now I have to find a way to get past maybe 40 or 50 different guys.
1:00:50
Unknown_12:
What the fuck?
Unknown_07: Holy shit!
Unknown_07: I'll protect you!
1:01:55
Unknown_02:
My buddy!
Unknown_11: Fuck!
Unknown_03: Yes, I get it. I am thoroughly fucking dead. Please, let me move now.
1:02:44
Unknown_03:
I don't know how to dodge that one.
1:03:30
Unknown_10:
No, you're supposed to block the dude.
Unknown_03: The only thing you don't do is you don't... you have to block. The game actively yells at you to block.
1:04:06
Unknown_03:
You dodge the attacks that say you can't block this shit.
Unknown_03: I just fucking... Oh... My fucking god. The game just fucking opened sticky keys for me. Fuck you!
Unknown_03: Well, there goes that run.
1:04:46
Unknown_03:
I guess I can't do anything else than just restart, I have to actually die. Alright, let me go pee. I don't know what I did to open fucking sticky keys with a fucking controller, cause you can't, there's no shift key on your fucking controller.
Unknown_10: I don't have, I don't have sticky keys.
Unknown_03: Turn on sticky keys, press, no, it's like you press shift five times and it opens it up no matter what the fuck you want.
1:05:22
Unknown_10:
All right, I'm going to the bathroom, I'll call you back.
1:07:06
Unknown_10:
They have lemon flavored Coke Zero here.
Unknown_03: I'm quite fond of it. The vanilla is pretty good too.
Unknown_02: Stop fucking burning me!
Unknown_03: Fuck it, let's get some practice in. Let's get some practice in!
1:07:38
Unknown_03:
Let's fuck up.
Unknown_03: And die immediately.
Unknown_03: Oh my god, the fire arrow is making it not even worth it. There's like eight of them.
Unknown_03: The final boss of this area? Yeah, right. That's a funny joke. There's no easy way to skip that area. If only I could open this or something.
1:08:13
Unknown_03:
And that guy just sees that.
1:09:30
Unknown_03:
He instantly fucking finds me he just immediately knows that I'm there and runs right at me before anybody else Anybody else knows
Unknown_03: Can't be too fucking drunk if he's on that kind of level of alert.
Unknown_03: He's more alert than fucking normal people. Fuck. This dude has some kind of fucking eagle eyesight. This is ridiculous.
1:10:23
Unknown_02:
Oops, fuck that up.
Unknown_03: I like how, even though I'm completely out of sight, that guy with the fucking Pyro Heroes is still firing directly at me.
Unknown_03: As if I've got some kind of fucking pinpointer stuck to my ass. Fuck off!
1:11:09
Unknown_02:
Look at this guy. Look at this fucking cunt.
Unknown_02: Fuck off! What are you doing?
1:12:44
Unknown_02:
Okay, how do I backstab the fat guy?
Unknown_02: Ah!
Unknown_02: Really?
Unknown_02: How the fuck did he hit me underneath the fucking porch? Fuck it. Go, go!
1:14:40
Unknown_03:
fuck fucker
1:15:28
Unknown_02:
What the fuck is that?
Unknown_02: What the fuck? I'm just poisoned?
Unknown_10: Oh. Yeah, after this I'm gonna have to call it quits, because this is- It's so long!
Unknown_03: It's so long to set up the boss fight. Like, I would never- I would never want to play one of these games again. Like, why the fuck would- Why would they do it like that? Why would they set up the game so that when you die to the boss, you cannot go directly back to the boss to fight the boss? Because that's why you're fucked. Like, that's all you want to do.
1:16:14
Unknown_03:
All you want to do is fight the boss again.
Unknown_03: I am jumping on the roofs, but when I get back to the fucking boss, I'm gonna have to set up the fucking fight all over again. There's no way around it. At this part in the game, I have to sit through ten minutes of running back and forth to set up the fucking fight before I can even do the fight. And if I fuck up the fight at all,
1:16:50
Unknown_03:
Then I might as well just restart. I'm not gonna be- Like that! Like that, that's it. That's the fucking fight. And now I'm missing half my health.
Unknown_03: Like there's no way to get behind the boss, and stab the boss in the back, and get the guys, and it takes- even if there is, it takes 15 minutes to do it. And if you fuck up after that, you might as well just reset.
1:17:41
Unknown_03:
gaylenoraylee I understand you have to clear a path to the boss
Unknown_03: I'm saying that it would be, it would be a better game if you didn't have to. Because all you want to do is reattempt it. If the whole point, if the whole sell of these games is that the bosses are real fucking difficult, then that should be the sell of the game. Like, don't make me fucking do this faggot shit over and over and over again.
Unknown_03: You just start making mistakes. You're playing and you're making mistakes because you're fucking bored of doing the exact same fucking thing over and over and over again.
1:18:36
Unknown_03:
Run around, go to the rock.
Unknown_03: Up on the rock.
Unknown_03: Up back down the rock. Go crouch.
Unknown_12: Kill this guy.
Unknown_12: Kill this guy.
1:19:08
Unknown_03:
Can I like shoot him with my thing and not attract the entire crowd of attention? I didn't get the boss yet. You gonna come?
Unknown_03: You gonna come?
Unknown_03: We're just going to slowly, slowly walk up with that shield.
Unknown_12: You're going to come.
Unknown_03: Slowly, slowly walk up.
1:19:50
Unknown_03:
Very slowly walk up.
Unknown_03: Oh, I missed. What the fuck's that?
Unknown_03: What's this API?
1:20:41
Unknown_12:
That didn't work. I know he can be that sad, but theoretically, in like a theoretical physics kind of way,
1:21:47
Unknown_03:
Oh, I fucking can't stand the goddamn motherfucking archers.
Unknown_03: I'm done fighting you, go away please.
1:22:30
Unknown_06:
Oh no, he's up. Oh, fuck.
Unknown_03: Nope.
Unknown_03: There goes that. There goes all that setup.
1:23:09
Unknown_12:
I thought that was a shield guy for some reason.
Unknown_02: Oh, so much for that. Wow, that's a real pretty setup. He's doing a real good job this time.
Unknown_03: Somebody said to use the fire on him when he fucking does that shit, but you know what? I'm not seeing any... any useful returns from that.
Unknown_03: I just wanna know what the fucking counter is. He doesn't have any kind of item counter like the rest.
1:24:01
Unknown_03:
oh I now I'm out now I'm out and I can't
Unknown_03: You know what my favorite part of this game is? I like it when you die, and you have to go back and do the exact same shit you've done 80 fucking times. That's the best part. Remember when I killed this guy the first time, and the second time, and the ninth time, and the twentieth time? I just killed him again.
1:24:35
Unknown_03:
I get to relive this fun memory of me killing that guy.
Unknown_03: Till the very end of time.
Unknown_03: And it never gets old.
Unknown_03: I used it on the fucking horse!
Unknown_03: What- What's the firecracker gonna do? Tell me. Is it the fire- Do I need to use the fire flame vent? Or do I need to use the shinobi firecracker? Which one? Which one is the one that kills this motherfucker when he uses the fucking gas?
1:25:11
Unknown_03:
Which one?
Unknown_03: Stun him with what?
Unknown_03: When he drinks or when he spews it out because I tried it when he drinks and doesn't work.
1:25:51
Unknown_03:
I can't sneak up on him.
Unknown_03: I've tried sneaking up on him, it doesn't work. If there's anything behind him... This is my favorite NPC. If you don't get him with that right one... I do have oil, I just don't use it.
Unknown_03: I just hate using this shit.
Unknown_03: It's one of the worst, having to use dispendable items like this in a game is one of my least favorite things. I don't like using consumables.
1:26:30
Unknown_03:
That's why I don't like The Witcher, because you have to constantly fucking make and use consumables to get to the game. And it's just like, I don't want to. I don't like the mechanic, I don't like fucking using it. I don't like thinking about it.
Unknown_03: Well, okay, when I want to set him on fire, what's the counter item? Because I'm being told to do it when he drinks or do it when he spews it out.
Unknown_03: And I tried doing it when he drinks and it doesn't work. Flame vent when he spews it out. Okay. I don't even know how to use an item.
1:27:05
Unknown_03:
Fuckin' Junkrat got alerted again.
Unknown_03: Of course, he's the fuckin' first one over here. I didn't like that.
Unknown_02: Okay. Can you fuck off?
1:27:44
Unknown_02:
I don't want to los- Oh, fuck off!
Unknown_02: Now he's going to get into a fight with the fucking guy again.
Unknown_03: Now I'm alerting those guys. Really, I really, really, really, really, really, really, really don't like the fucking setup of this boss.
Unknown_12: Really?
1:28:23
Unknown_03:
What's funny is now I got the thing for that boss, but I haven't killed any of the helpers.
Unknown_03: And I'm running over here because I want to lose him.
Unknown_03: And I can't lose him.
Unknown_03: I'm wondering if I can just fight him over here.
1:29:53
Unknown_03:
Fuck this, fuck this!
Unknown_03: It's always something. It can't just be fucking easy.
Unknown_03: It's not that cat motherfucker, it's one of these motherfuckers.
Unknown_03: Of course, I'm using all my fucking crucifixes for the actual boss fight.
1:30:27
Unknown_03:
Okay, do I do it when he spits?
Unknown_07: It's not what I want.
Unknown_12: It's not what I want.
1:31:11
Unknown_02:
It doesn't work! The fucking thing you told me to do does not fucking work!
Unknown_12: I'm dead.
Unknown_03: What?
Unknown_03: That was all the other guy. I didn't do anything.
1:31:43
Unknown_03:
Why does he have a third one?
Unknown_03: Why does this guy have three lives?
Unknown_02: He got me with the fucking poison again, and I'm completely out of health.
1:32:27
Unknown_03:
Okay, I'm done. I can't- I had him on the fucking ground.
Unknown_03: I had him on the fucking ground.
Unknown_03: And he completely recovered all his posture, because... For what reason? I'll do it one more time. If it's not this last time, I'm done. Because this is not fun. And somebody offered me like $2,500 to play this game, and I don't... I would rather just not... I'd rather just not have it. I'd rather go work a fucking job. Than play this... I'm so lucked by a guy kicking dirt.
1:32:59
Unknown_03:
I don't, how, how do you de-aggro the fucking boss in two feet of him?
Unknown_03: It was literally two fucking feet!
Unknown_03: I didn't lose him, I wasn't near the fucking alley, I was in the middle of the fucking yard.
Unknown_03: The dude has fucking keen eyesight, can find me across the fucking map, but not when I'm two feet from him? Fuck off.
1:33:31
Unknown_03:
No, I know the guy, I'll just ban him, he didn't pay me.
Unknown_03: He gave me money beforehand.
Unknown_03: But not enough, not the actual. Do this again, do the thing, do that again, oh I'm burned. There it goes, it should just reset because it's fucking over. I did not lose him in the, I would, dude.
Unknown_03: This is not the fucking alley. I was right fucking here. I am not near the alley. I'm not near anything that looks like a fucking alley. There is no alley here. This is the middle of the fucking open.
1:34:06
Unknown_03:
And the people saying, use the fucking, use the fucking thing, use the fucking thing to set him on fire, it's bullshit. I've not, I hit him when he skews it, I hit him when he fucking drinks it, doesn't set him on fire. Doesn't matter how close I am, doesn't matter what his fucking animation is, he does not get set on fire. I've dumped multiple entire loads of those fucking ability points into him, and it just, it doesn't fucking work.
1:34:41
Unknown_03:
I was told the flame vent. If it's the fucking firecracker, I'm gonna be pissed. I just want it to be over. I want it to be over so I can do something else.
1:35:40
Unknown_03:
Throw oil at him. I don't even, dude, I don't even know how to use the fucking oil. I don't know how to use the fucking oil.
Unknown_10: Multiple people did. Sherry fucking did.
Unknown_03: And Sherry hasn't lied.
Unknown_03: I still haven't heard from multiple people what item I'm supposed to use on which animation. I'm being told I'm supposed to use like a combination of different shit now.
1:36:15
Unknown_03:
I don't know what the use item button is.
Unknown_03: And I only have ten uses of that fucking flame barrel. Or the oil. How many fucking times am I gonna have to repeat it?
Unknown_03: Because I'm going to use that in one or two fights. And it's going to take me at least eight more fucking attempts of this stupid bullshit before I fucking kill him. And when I do kill him, it's going to be on pure fucking accident.
1:36:59
Unknown_12:
Oh, I used that on... oh.
Unknown_02: Got one out. This is my favorite part.
1:38:05
Unknown_08:
What the fuck?
1:39:24
Unknown_12:
I'm getting attention from the other side of the map now.
Unknown_03: Great.
1:40:28
Unknown_11:
Damn it!
Unknown_07: Get me off the fucking rock!
1:41:17
Unknown_03:
Hey, my guy's alive.
Unknown_03: Motion, motion.
Unknown_03: I kept my guy alive. Did I get an achievement for that?
Unknown_03: For keeping him alive?
Unknown_03: I'm not killing my friend. Fuck off.
Unknown_03: He did all the work.
1:42:13
Unknown_03:
What if I die now?
Unknown_03: I'm gonna be angrier than I've ever been in my entire life.
Unknown_03: I'm gonna be a fuckin' Buddha. So now, for now, what's up? Young Master, Young Master's eating a napkin. Young Master needs you.
1:42:58
Unknown_03:
Fuck you!
Unknown_03: Young Master... Dreadful Illusion 2. Without Snap Speed it can't be overcome. What the fuck is this?
Unknown_03: What do I do?
1:43:35
Unknown_03:
Snap speeds are useless ignore them. I don't trust them.
Unknown_03: Oh good, more oil. That's what I need. There's a thing behind the two guys.
Unknown_03: Don't go farther. Okay, I'll come back, I guess. Because I got the blue. I guess I can come back at any time.
1:44:08
Unknown_03:
But I was told I should do this before going to the horse.
Unknown_03: Am I going to the horse or should I do this one? Cause I'm at the- I'm at both.
1:44:40
Unknown_03:
Try it.
Unknown_03: Well I wanna wrap it up. I wanna- What the fucking- Is this the- I don't remember where I found the oil.
Unknown_11: Oh, there it is. What the fuck?
Unknown_11: What's the point of this area?
1:45:17
Unknown_03:
What the fuck is that? Prayer, dude.
Unknown_03: Oh, that's nice. Well, this is a nice area.
1:45:59
Unknown_03:
That woman sounds like she's having a bad day.
Unknown_03: Okay, sh-uh, Cherry!
Unknown_03: What am I doing? Guiding me.
1:46:36
Unknown_03:
What abilities? These two?
Unknown_03: Run and slide. Which ones? I got four. Okay.
Unknown_03: When the ability to reduce ability, perceive those are in self-removal and present as part of what defines their shinobi. Okay. I can stealth better. And this one increased the maximum number of spirit elements. Helm spirit elements, and I shouldn't regret those regrets or vile actions. Spirit. Okay.
Unknown_03: Oh.
Unknown_03: Wait, how many spirit emblems can I hold down? Okay.
1:47:09
Unknown_03:
I'll just rest, I guess. And then I'll go.
Unknown_03: That guy.
Unknown_03: Am I going down to this boss or am I going back to the horse?
1:47:47
Unknown_03:
Okay, Orange Cow really, really, really, really wants me to try this one.
Unknown_03: Die to this boss. That I can do.
Unknown_03: It's the little girl again.
Unknown_09: Father... Mother... Little girl... Where did everyone go?
Unknown_06: Miko-sama. Is this real? It's been a while, my son of Fukuro.
1:48:24
Unknown_09:
Young lady. Please tell me. You are...
Unknown_05: Do what you have to do. I understand.
Unknown_11: Well, let's do this. Lord Segare.
1:49:25
Unknown_09:
Model of a sea beast.
1:50:22
Unknown_12:
Well, is that it?
1:51:07
Unknown_03:
Okay, back to the horse.
1:51:54
Unknown_05:
How do I dodge this guy's attacks by the way?
1:52:32
Unknown_03:
Really?
Unknown_03: God fucking dammit.
Unknown_03: Fucking die. His weapon is so unrealistic, it's impossible.
Unknown_03: to figure out when it's actually going to land. It's so easy with the bitch, because the bitch is like very clearly telegraphed. She's got reasonable weapons. She's not on a fucking horse. The horse guy is like, oh, my fucking spear has like a 20 mile invisible radius around it, where if you are anywhere near that fucking spear, that counts as a hit. Also, your parries have to be extremely precise.
1:53:41
Unknown_03:
Leave the horse guy people say the horse is easier horse is easier Josh Josh Oh
Unknown_03: Surely, was that something that I'm not supposed to block?
1:54:20
Unknown_02:
It sure felt like I was blocking during that.
Unknown_02: I was blocking.
Unknown_03: This is a mess.
Unknown_03: It feels like such... Really?
1:55:23
Unknown_02:
I can't block.
Unknown_02: I can't. It sure as fuck doesn't feel like it.
1:56:38
Unknown_03:
What the fuck?
Unknown_03: The horse better be okay.
Unknown_03: The horsey okay? Oh no! The horsey dead! What the fuck?
Unknown_03: The horse didn't do anything!
1:57:12
Unknown_03:
Yeah, it didn't feel like I earned that one, because I died too much.
Unknown_03: Whoops.
Unknown_03: Which one's Tengu? Is Tengu the, um... Oh, I didn't want to kill the horse. I don't feel good about that one.
Unknown_03: I should have been able to ride the horse.
Unknown_03: Is Tengu the Buddha?
Unknown_12: Oh, what? I have a friend.
1:57:44
Unknown_03:
I would like a friend please.
Unknown_03: At this tower?
Unknown_03: Up the stairs.
Unknown_03: It was a rape horse. Like in Japanese animes. Is that him? No.
Unknown_03: Tengu!
1:58:18
Unknown_03:
Tengu, moshi moshi!
Unknown_03: Tengu? Oh, hi! I'm sure there's a part of me that finds him annoying a lot, but I don't think there's a very good bite on him.
Unknown_03: I can't, do I need to buy that gourd seed? Do I need to buy this shit?
1:58:52
Unknown_03:
Yes. No.
Unknown_03: Okay. I'll come back then.
Unknown_07: I guess that's not the Tengu though.
Unknown_03: Tengu?
Unknown_03: Where are you? I don't see Tengu.
1:59:38
Unknown_03:
You know what I do have money because I have those big bags of shit Which one do I need more between the firecrackers or the gourd seed I
Unknown_03: Okay, inside the pagoda, the big building next to me. Okay, I gotcha. If I have to choose between one, which one do I need more?
Unknown_03: I have the firecrackers?
Unknown_03: I can afford it though. Which one do I need more? Okay, I already have the firecracker. I thought maybe it was like an upgrade or something.
2:00:43
Unknown_03:
Okay, I have the guard seat.
Unknown_03: Oh, I can- That means I can upgrade my healing thing. Okay.
Unknown_00: Tengu! Oh, he does have the spooky Japanese gabber right now.
Unknown_03: I'm wolf!
Unknown_00: Don't you have a name for me? A ninja is usually like that. You don't have a name, and you die. However... That left arm... It reminds me of a ninja. I see.
2:01:15
Unknown_00:
So you're Sekiwan's wolf. I like you. Then... Sekiro. I'll call you that. Who are you? I am Ashina's tengu.
2:01:49
Unknown_00:
Oh, Sekiro. Do you also hunt mice? What? There are mice in this Ashina.
Unknown_00: Your face is full of selfishness. There are many types of rats, but you should cut them off from one end. It seems that you have the talent of killing people. I think it would be useful to polish that talent. What do you think, Sekiro? Are you going to kill the rats? I understand.
2:02:24
Unknown_03:
A description of the rats that have snuck into Ashina. Speak to the Tengu again when the rats are dealt with. The rats, assassins from Senpou Temple. Short stature, wear bamboo hats. A large number of rats are lurking about, can be seen around the Ashina castle.
2:02:59
Unknown_00:
It's a rat's face and a hole. Come and cut it! If you do that, I'll give you something useful for your battle. Wow!
Unknown_04: Did you survive? Did the demon godmother finally become a corpse? But nothing will change. The war will continue. The corpses will be piled up, and there will be only funerals. You...
2:03:35
Unknown_04:
Have you ever thought about it? Where will that kind of energy accumulate? I doubt it. I doubt it. That's why you and Ayatsu are so pitiful.
2:04:15
Unknown_03:
Anything else from here on in?
2:05:02
Unknown_03:
back then I want that prayer bead right?
Unknown_03: I need that for updating my stamina.
Unknown_03: I try not to interrupt when people talk in the game because DSP does that and it's like if you know nothing about the game might be curious about it but.
Unknown_03: Hug the wall.
Unknown_03: One of these is a secret wall? How the fuck do I get up there?
2:05:40
Unknown_03:
Anal beading basement.
Unknown_03: Oh, aha!
Unknown_03: Let's see.
Unknown_03: platforming it's not gonna go well oh man oh man I can already tell this is gonna make me angrier than the fucking fat man
2:06:33
Unknown_03:
Fuck!
Unknown_03: Why the fuck do I do that?
Unknown_03: Well, aha. Aha.
Unknown_03: At last, my anal bead, well earned.
Unknown_03: Anything else up here? Nope.
2:07:29
Unknown_12:
Alright.
Unknown_03: It's time to say hi to mom.
Unknown_03: I didn't mean to play this long, but I've been on a roll. I mean, I might as well.
2:08:09
Unknown_03:
Oh, upgrade gourd, increase attack power. Okay. I guess I could.
Unknown_03: How do I increase attack power?
Unknown_04: Enhance attack power.
2:09:08
Unknown_03:
The battle memory of an extraordinary foe, the distant recollection of such a memory provided sustenance for the wolf. Gyobu Oniwa once led a group of infamous bandits but was defeated by Isshin, who was so captivated by his show of strength that he took him in as an Ashina warrior. Oniwa would later go on to become Genichiro Ashina's most trusted retainer.
Unknown_03: What did the horse do then?
Unknown_03: Horse don't do shit. That's all I have to say about that. Why don't y'all let mom keep it for ya?
2:10:06
Unknown_03:
Here we go, here we go, here we go. I feel good about this boss because there's not a bunch of bullshit.
Unknown_03: Let's do this!
2:10:52
Unknown_03:
I was doing that for the first time
2:12:07
Unknown_08:
Get fucked, bitch!
Unknown_08: I did it!
Unknown_09: But... I have to... I have to kill her twice? What? What the fuck is that shit? Really?
2:12:41
Unknown_03:
Really?
2:13:23
Unknown_03:
What do I do during the second one? I used up all my shurikens during the first, I think.
Unknown_02: Can I block the, uh, the kick?
2:14:28
Unknown_03:
How do I use the snaps need them oh just there I Mean if I use it do I lose it So I only get one use with it is that is that the the gist or do I get it back when I die I
Unknown_03: It really does not feel like I can dodge those kicks.
2:15:34
Unknown_09:
You know, really, what's the point of putting that fucking guy there?
Unknown_03: Besides just to personally fucking annoy me? I can't dodge that.
2:16:34
Unknown_09:
I'm not done with you yet.
2:17:35
Unknown_12:
really she uses kicks defensively and offensively so it's hard to tell if she's
Unknown_12: Okay.
Unknown_03: Also learned, don't miss that one.
2:19:52
Unknown_09:
There's still a long way to go.
2:20:24
Unknown_03:
I don't know.
2:21:01
Unknown_03:
Her posture recovers more quickly than mine.
Unknown_03: So like when it comes to actually like personally recovering from what's happening, I can't.
Unknown_09: I don't know. Maybe I should take a break between this one.
Unknown_03: I haven't even gotten to the second stage Yeah, yeah, I know he used shurikens I don't like it's frustrating cuz like okay you approach this you would expect it to play out the exact same way But it doesn't What the fuck
2:22:09
Unknown_12:
Okay, realistically, what is coming back later?
Unknown_03: I don't remember her blocking so well the first time. I mean...
2:23:30
Unknown_03:
Really?
Unknown_03: I had my... I'm not standing for that. I put my fucking shuriken on her.
Unknown_03: Did it miss? Did my fucking shuriken miss? Is that what happened with my fucking shuriken not connecting?
2:24:20
Unknown_03:
Again, I'm hitting her in the fucking air with this shuriken. There's a 100% chance I'm actually fucking doing it.
2:24:55
Unknown_03:
Meanwhile, her fucking health is recovering as fast as fucking possible.
Unknown_02: Look at that shit!
Unknown_03: Just be mid-air not standing on wire? What fucking wire?
2:25:35
Unknown_03:
Alright, I just want to try to get her to the second stage once.
2:26:41
Unknown_09:
Not bad, Segare-dono. Now then, my phantom, go to the window.
Unknown_09: Yo!
2:27:20
Unknown_02:
Yo yo yo! Fuck this!
Unknown_03: What?!
Unknown_03: Okay, that's more. That's more than I can take.
Unknown_03: Cause the fucking spirits not only apparently have some kind of like bullshit fucking move
2:28:15
Unknown_09:
Alright, I'll try more later.
Unknown_03: That's the limit I can take. At least the horse. I feel bad for the horse, too.
Unknown_03: I fucking hate video games.
Unknown_10: Do I even have any songs I want to play? I'm feeling tired.
Unknown_10: Hmm.
2:28:58
Unknown_10:
Nah, fuck it. I don't think I'll play a song. I'm going to play a song for the real one.
Unknown_03: Oh, I should call Mumkey.
Unknown_10: Okay. What's his phone number?
Unknown_10: What's his phone number?
Unknown_10: Is he still alive?
2:29:33
Unknown_10:
Dog press, amigo!
Unknown_10: Oh, I see.
Unknown_01: Thanks jumper. Thanks for the Canadian buck Dominic our text coming through I sent one Yeah, I have about 800 text messages and people are still calling on snapchat to this to this very moment How am I supposed to solicit nudes from fans on snapchat
2:30:17
Unknown_01:
New boomer versus zoomer when uh, it looks like a stereos donated.
Unknown_00: Hi, you've reached 1 5 1 5 8 8 2 0 0 6 5 Please leave your message bad dragon knight.
Unknown_01: Oh, here he is
Unknown_03: Do I have to do it, like, at a certain time?
Unknown_01: I've been on his stream a bunch of times. If you go to mumkeyjones.tv and scroll down to the bottom where it says Mumkey's Recommendations, there's like a three-hour stream of me and Nick talking about Asperger. So, I really like Nick. I don't know his take on me as of the last couple months. He's probably on the Fuck Mumkey train. That's fine. I still like him. I think he's a Chad dad. I like that he isn't ashamed to
2:30:54
Unknown_01:
Brewskis on stream and by Brewskis I mean hard liquor.
Unknown_03: What is he answering?
Unknown_01: A little too Christian for my taste, but he's a great guy.
Unknown_01: Conmix for 2.99, I'm still alive fam, I love you. I love you too, Conmix. Stream the debate. Somebody already suggested that! Glad to shit on CNN. 13 hours until the retribution video.
2:31:28
Unknown_01:
My tongue wants retribution for the pain and suffering it went through in the process of making the video, so...
Unknown_01: I'm going to answer, man.
Unknown_01: I guess I have no option. I don't get to talk to him.
2:32:12
Unknown_01:
Noah's dank food reviews call me to the electric boogaloo Fun is infinite. Can you change your name to punished a monkey?
Unknown_03: Well, sorry guys.
Unknown_01: I tried I have to pay to talk to monkey.
Unknown_03: Fuck that All right, I'll try to patch third one if I can I'll see you guys in a bit